I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Small penises have feelings too.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
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