she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
