at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
