there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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