haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
