Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize