Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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