whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
