am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
