If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
