Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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