Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I feel great
I just peed on a car
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
