She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize