if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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