Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize