oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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