i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
