i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Randomize
