I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
