Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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