My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
