exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
