I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize