also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize
