just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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