to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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