Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize