Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
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