Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
