i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
so much tequila, so little girl.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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