So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
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