meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Damn victory sex feels great
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
