butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
