Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
my poor anus
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
