I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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