Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
