NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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