question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
