Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
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