the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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