Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize