Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
