I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
