My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize