fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
