You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Randomize
