TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
