11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
