it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
