Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
