ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
